My toddler prefers to climb on his toys (such as his garage) - how can I help him play with them the way they were designed to be played with?
Dr Richard Woolfson's Answer:
Your toddler sounds like one of those who likes to be on the go the whole time, to explore everything he can and to make new discoveries at every opportunity. And he has bags of energy. That's perfectly normal at this age. You can help him become more focussed, however, so that he uses his toys more purposefully, and not just as an impromptu obstacle course!
To help your toddler get more out of his play, sit with him when he shows interest in his toy garage. Your presence will by itself have a settling influence. Ask him to hand you the different parts of the toy and comment on their colours and shapes as he hands them to you. Ask him where he is going to put the toy cars, who is in them, and so on. Suggest he puts one of the cars here, another of the cars there. You'll find that he plays like that for at least a couple of minutes before he starts to climb all over the place. As you repeat this with different toys, his concentration steadily improves and his play gradually becomes more purposeful
My 15-month-old is scared of some of her toys, such as her rocking horses. What can I do to help her overcome any fears?
Doctor Woolfson's Answer:
It might be that she is afraid because the toys are so large. Her rocking horse will be physically much larger than her, and perhaps she finds that intimidating. One solution, therefore, is to think about the toys that seem to frighten her, and then identify a common theme that links them.
If it is their size, then there are two strategies you can adopt. First, try to find smaller examples of the same item, such as a smaller rocking horse or a smaller stuffed toy dog. A second solution is to gradually get your 15-month-old used to the toys that upset her, perhaps by having them in the same room with her as but keeping them well away from her. Then, over a few days, play for a while minutes with your daughter in the room but each time play closer to the object that disturbs her, calming her if she appears to be upset. Eventually you and she will end up playing beside the large toy, at which point you can suggest she gently touches it once then leaves it alone; in each successive day, steadily build up her contact with the item in this way, until she is no longer afraid.
Another possibility, of course is that she has learned that reacting badly to a toy is a effective way of getting your attention. If that might be a factor with our toddler, stay calm when she gets upset, smile as you reassure her for a few moments, and then get on with what you were doing before she started making a fuss.
My 18 month old only has 3 or 4 words. Do you have any tips to help his language develop?
Doctor Woolfson's Answer:
Bear in mind that your toddler understands many more words than he can say, so his understanding of spoken language is more advanced that you might expect. In addition, the average time gap between a toddler's first word and establishing a vocabulary of 10 words is around three months - that's an awful lot of repetition. No wonder you are becoming frustrated! Yet this period of apparent slow language development enables your child to build a solid basis for future language growth.
So all you need to do at this stage is give him lots of language stimulation. For example, talk to him as you and he go through your usual routine each day. Explain what you are doing, where you are taking him and describe all the things you can see. Sing to him(or use a CD of children's songs), and read him lots of stories (for instance, from a child's story book). When he does use spoken language, make a big fuss of him and let him see that you are delighted. Show him how to build the words he has into sentences, as this provides a model for him to copy. For example, if he says "doggie" when he sees a dog, you can say "yes, that's a dog". Be patient with him.
When is the best age to introduce my baby to books?
Doctor Woolfson's Answer:
You can start this almost straight away, for instance, you can let your baby see you hold a book in your hands while you read him a story, and you can have very simple picture books in his room. However, as soon he is old enough to sit upright with support, you can began to show him the inside of picture books (those with one image to a page). Talk enthusiastically about the picture on the page, point to it and try to draw his attention to it. While he is still looking, let him see you turn the page. If he tries to reach for the page or the whole book, let him.
Certainly by the age of 3 or 4 months, looking at basic books like this should be part of his daily activities. As your baby continues to develop during this first year, make sure he has a range of books to look at, although he probably enjoys going through his favourite one again and again. Your aim at this stage is simply to initiate his enthusiasm for books and reading, so don’t overdo it! You just want him to understand that books are special, interesting and fun. A few minutes play with books each day is ample at this stage.
What makes my child right or left handed?
Doctor Woolfson's Answer:
Hand preference is not present at birth. When a young baby starts to explore the world with her hands, she shows no preference for one over the other and is able to use them with equal competence. It is only towards the end of the end of the second year that toddlers begin to show a preference for using one hand instead of the other, but you may find even at this age your child uses one hand for months at a time then switches comfortably to the other. Hand dominance, however, is nearly always firmly established by the age of three or four years, although there are a few children who remain ambidextrous (able to use both hands competently) throughout their life.
Psychologists are unable to say where hand preference comes from – some claim it is innate while others claim it is learned. If parents are concerned about their infant’s possible left-handedness, they can gently encourage her - up to the age of 12 or 15 months only - to use her right hand. But that does not mean pressurising her into using her right hand all the time. Rather it means providing opportunities for their infant to use her right hand, for example by handing things to her right side. After that age, the choice of hand should definitely be left with the infant.
How can I stop my two-year-old from getting too many Easter eggs for Easter ?
Doctor Woolfson's Answer:
It’s not easy managing your two-year-old’s Easter treats when there are so many friends and relatives who want to give her a gift at this time of the year. You don’t want her to be spoiled with toys or sweets, but neither do you want her to miss out. Do your best to strike a balance.
When it comes to Easter eggs, decide now how many your toddler is allowed over Easter, and stick exactly to that number. Resist any temptation tot buy her any more than that and give them to her in small amounts, spread out over the period. In addition, you could ask friends and relatives not to buy her Easter eggs but instead buy her a toy for Easter – that would keep everybody happy. There are lots of toys for this age group than cost no more than a chocolate Easter egg, and they will last longer! And if you have, say, grandparents who especially want to buy your toddler an Easter egg, you can let them give her one of the ones that you had planned to give; that way the number remains the same.
If you find that despite your best efforts, the Easter treats become too much, you could also consider encouraging your two-year-old’s sense of caring for others by taking her with you to donate any excess gifts to your local children’s hospital.
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